"GROWING BEYOND ADDICTION"

How Does Addiction Affect You and Your Family?

The family suffers from addiction in many ways.  There is more divorce, domestic violence, child abuse, depression, anxiety, and general medical problems in families dealing with addiction.  It impacts the stability of the home, the family's unity, mental health, physical health, and overall family dynamic.  Addiction is not just about the drinking and/or drug use by the alcoholic or addict.  It also profoundly affects their thinking and behavior.  Ultimately, it affects every aspect of their llives including YOU, their loved one.  Over time it gradually affects your thinking and behavior until you reach the point where you wonder how you got to be the person you've become.  You become preoccupied with the addict's drinking, eating or using either by obsessing about it and the ways to control it, or by trying to numb yourself to it and its effects.  You begin to question yourself and your perceptions of what's normal.  You may feel like or be accused of being the "crazy" one.  This sometimes paralyzes us from taking action regarding our loved one's addiction.  You tolerate negative behavior and find yourself behaving in ways that you later regret, all the while hoping the situation will get better even as it continues to get worse.  Does this sound familiar?

As a result of the denial, which is the hallmark of the disease, you tell yourself it's not that bad.  You cover  up for the addict or try to punish them for their behavior.  Your life becomes centered on the addiction.  When this occurs it limits your ability to be emotionally available to your children or other loved ones in your life; they too become casualties of the disease.  You reach a point where you're not certain how or why things have changed, but they have and the love and caring in your family has been lost, and you settle for less.  The good news is that addiction is treatable for you, your family and the addict in your life.  You don't have to go on living your life controlled by the addiction.

WHO SHOULD ATTEND "GROWING BEYOND ADDICTION" GROUPS?  Any family members or close friends who are involved in the addict's life.  It is not an appropriate setting to bring young children or infants.  It is fine to bring preteens and teenage children.

WHEN ARE THESE MEETINGS?  Meetings are held every Tuesday evening.  Sign-in starts at 5:20 pm in the Serenity House downstairs main office.  It is important to be on time because the meeting starts promptly at 5:40 pm.  It runs for about an hour, and you are invited to stay for the open AA meeting at 7:00 pm.

TOPICS COVERED:

"ADDICTION AND ENABLING" - In this group we discuss how addiction begins and the risk factors for addiction.  ENABLING is doing for another person what they are capable of doing for themselves.  Discussion is about what enabling behaviors look like and positive steps that can be taken to stop this behavior and help the chemically dependent person become accountable for their own welfare.

"ADDICTION  AND CO-DEPENDENCY" - This group will discuss the symptoms and feelings of addiction.  It will point out ways that co-dependency and addiction have many of the same traits.  Education about repeated rescue attempts (done with the best of intentions) will allow the chemically dependent person to continue on with their course of destruction.  A review of ways to change this pattern will be presented. 

"ADDICTION AND DETACHING WITH LOVE" -  This includes a comparison of the social user versus the abuser versus the addict.  DETACHING WITH LOVE means we detach from the chemically dependent's PROBLEMS - it does NOT mean we stop caring or loving that person!  HOW to detach with love will be presented during this group  Family will learn the importance of "LETTING GO" or how they can expect to be dragged for the ride of their life with a chemically dependent person.

WE ENCOURAGE FAMILY/FRIENDS TO START ON A JOURNEY OF RECOVERY FOR THEMSELVES.  AL-ANON IS A PROGRAM WHICH SUPPORTS THIS PROCESS.  FAMILY THERAPY OR INDIVIDUAL COUNSELING CAN HELP WITH RECOVERY OF THE WHOLE FAMILY FROM THIS DISEASE.

Serenity House recognizes the challenges that clients and their loved ones face upon discharge, and we therefore provide (free of charge) individual family sessions.  Clients and the family are provided the opportunity to have a private session with a trained counselor to address any individual questions or concerns.  It is a very helpful process designed to bring the family back together from difficult times.